


does it drive you wild?

by hamssi



Series: movies for two [1]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst with a Happy Ending, Light Angst, i have so much hw, jisung centric, jisung has a bumblebee pillow pet Mwah, past renhyuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-24
Updated: 2019-09-24
Packaged: 2020-10-27 04:44:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20754554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hamssi/pseuds/hamssi
Summary: Before he can stop himself though, he says, “You didn’t tell me Donghyuck was so pretty.”Renjun’s head shoots up at an alarming speed, “Huh?”“Donghyuck is pretty,” Jisung puts it simply, grip tightening around his bumblebee Pillow Pet.





	does it drive you wild?

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by the song "last girl" by soccer mommy.
> 
> hope u like it!! i wrote this in one day it was super stressful but i thought it was ... kinda cute idk 
> 
> if u find any mistakes plz let me know i was too lazy to read over it again but without further ado, happy reading!!! :D
> 
> p.s. i love jisung

** _I want to be like your last girl_ **

** _She’s got looks that drive you wild and_ **

** _Love the way she wears her makeup_ **

** _She would be so nice to wake up to_ **

Renjun sometimes mentions Donghyuck in passing.

Jisung never thinks too much of it. Most of the time, he’s distracted by the curls that fall in Renjun’s eyes and the warmth of the other’s hands in his own.

All Jisung knows is that Renjun loved him a lot, enough to have sketchbooks full of the boy’s face. He’s seen them before, shoved haphazardly under the older boy’s bed in stacks. Albeit, the books have maybe only 100 pages and are filled with things other than Donghyuck, but _ still_.

Jisung first meets Donghyuck when he’s visiting Renjun for the weekend.

“Hello,” he greets the boy who stands outside of Renjun’s dorm room. Jisung recognizes him from the drawings, but he quickly concludes that the drawings really don’t do him justice. 

“Hi! Um, are you Renjun’s roommate?” _ God_, Jisung thinks, _ his voice is pretty_.

“No, I um ... his boyfriend. I am. Yeah,” Jisung breathes out, cheeks flushed from his inability to speak straight.

Donghyuck’s eyes widen, “Oh my god, Renjun didn’t tell me he had a boyfriend.” Jisung being Jisung, he assumes the worst from the simple statement and feels his heart drop. “No, not like that! I just mean that … Renjun’s my best friend. He usually tells me these things, you know?” 

Jisung gets momentarily distracted by the older boy’s smile. It’s then when he notices the colored tint spread across Donghyuck’s perfectly shaped lips. He feels a tugging somewhere in his gut, the feeling so familiar that he can only label it as one thing; jealousy. 

“So, you’re here to visit him? I can come back tomorrow, if you want. I was just here to bother him ‘cause he’s been a little mopey lately.”

“Mopey?” Jisung pushes away the feeling in his gut to make space for worry. Renjun sounded fine over the phone.

Donghyuck sends another smile his way, “Yeah, I didn’t know why, but I guess he’s been missing you. Anyway, I should get going now. I’ll see you around, yeah?”

Later, Jisung finds himself buried under Renjun’s sheets as Renjun sits at his desk, preoccupied with an assignment. They’ve talked the whole moping thing out, but Jisung still hasn’t mentioned his encounter with Donghyuck. He isn’t sure how to bring it up in conversation without sounding too jealous.

Before he can stop himself though, he says, “You didn’t tell me Donghyuck was so pretty.”

Renjun’s head shoots up at an alarming speed, “Huh?”

“Donghyuck is pretty,” Jisung puts it simply, grip tightening around his bumblebee Pillow Pet.

“I… Why are you bringing this up?”

He gets a little lost staring at the older boy again, who’s wearing his university sweater and a pair of sweatpants that certainly don’t match the weather outside. Jisung only remembers they’re in the middle of a conversation when Renjun shoots him another look. He looks more than lost, but Jisung doesn’t blame him for it. 

“I saw him outside of your dorm earlier.” A pause. “Does his lip gloss taste nice?”

  
  
“Jisung!” Renjun is blushing now and Jisung has to stop himself from frowning. He knows he brought this upon himself.

The younger boy shrugs it off, averting his eyes to Renjun’s bedsheets, “Just a thought. You must have been real happy being with someone like him.”

  
  
Renjun doesn’t respond.

** _I want to be like your last girl_ **

** _She’s the sun in your cold world_ **

** _I am just a dying flower_ **

** _I don’t hold the summer in my eyes_ **

“School has been way too much for me lately,” Renjun sighs, adjusting his laptop screen with watercolor covered fingers, “This project was the last thing I needed.” 

Jisung’s heart aches at how visibly exhausted the older boy looks. 

“I wish I could come visit this weekend,” Jisung mumbles as he plugs in his phone to charge, laying back on his bed with his phone hovering just above his face. 

(It takes all the strength in his hands to not to drop the phone right on his nose.)

He watches Renjun dip his brush into water, humming, “I know. I miss you. Donghyuck’s dragging me off campus this weekend, though, something about getting rid of stress. He’s actually been helping me out a lot lately.” 

Jisung deflates a little, but forces himself to keep a happy tone, “Really?”

“Yeah! He stops by often to make sure I’m eating and staying hydrated. Sometimes he brings me snacks as an excuse to stay a little and get my mind off of things. You know, stuff like that.”

“Oh um,” the younger stammers, “I didn’t realize you were still that close.”

Renjun laughs, the sound enough to put Jisung at ease for a moment, “Baby, he knows me better than anyone. Our past doesn’t phase him at all.” 

It’s an offhand comment that shouldn’t affect him so much, but Jisung curls in on himself anyway. He should be happy that Renjun has someone to take care of him and keep him happy when Jisung can’t be there to do so, but he can’t help the fear and envy that invade his thoughts.

Jisung has never been good at cheering people up, and he finds it especially hard with Renjun because of their differences. He’s so awkward and unsure of his words that Renjun usually ends up laughing, so Donghyuck almost sounds like a trained professional compared to Jisung.

“I wish I was him,” he breathes out, eyes glued to his boyfriend.

“What was that?”

“Nothing,” Jisung rolls over onto his stomach and pulls his hood over his head, “What are you painting again?”

** _I want to be like your last girl_ **

** _She’s got looks that hypnotize and_ **

** _She could keep you occupied_ **

** _I know she still hangs in your mind these days_ **

Winter comes around with temperatures enough to have Jisung come home from school just to prepare a hot chocolate for himself every day. He’s sure he has an addiction and has no doubt about it when he calls his mom to buy him some more, no hesitation whatsoever.

Often after his hot chocolate splurges, he takes a nap that lasts his entire afternoon. Today is maybe the only time he regrets letting himself indulge in the well-needed rest.

**renjun the loml**

baby

hiii

i miss u

**renjun the loml**

hello?? :(

are u asleep AGAIN 

**renjun the loml**

call me when u wake up!!!

Jisung quickly taps the call button, holding the phone up to his ear as he sits up in his bed. It’s only been an hour since Renjun last texted, he’s sure the older boy isn’t busy.

“Hi lovebug, how was your nap?” Renjun answers. Jisung can hear the smile in his voice.

“Hi. My nap was good, actually,” Jisung hums, happy to hear his boyfriend’s voice first thing after a good rest. “Do you wanna FaceTime?”

“I would say yes but I’m actually with Hyuck right now. He invited me out while you were sleeping. Also, the lounge on campus is actually really nice, and I had no idea until he brought me here. Good wifi, too!” 

“Oh, okay.” Jisung’s teeth dig into his bottom lip almost painfully. _ He shouldn’t have taken that stupid nap_. 

“He says hi, by the way, and he’s asking why he hasn’t seen you around lately,” Renjun says after a bit of silence.

“Yeah, Jisung,” he hears Donghyuck’s voice faintly, “Come soon before he gets all mopey and makes me take care of him again!”

Jisung’s next words come out a little weaker than he expected, “Will do.”

Renjun laughs at something that Donghyuck must’ve said before returning his attention back to Jisung, “Movie later? I know it’s a school night but I miss you.”

Jisung can only mumble a soft, “Yeah, text me,” before he hangs up, dropping his phone onto the sheets next to him. It’s unlike him to not reply to the older boy’s affection, but he thinks a moment longer would have his voice too shaky for Renjun not to notice. 

He lays in his bed with his eyes stuck on the motion of the ceiling fan for so long that he falls asleep again. When he wakes up and finds that it’s much too late for a movie, Jisung sends Renjun a half-assed apology.

**me**

sorry fell asleep again

can’t do the movie tonight

maybe next week

** _Maybe I’m just feeling like_ **

** _I don’t have a chance this time_ **

** _‘Cause I don’t have a chance this time, I swear_ **

** _Why would you still wanna be with me?_ **

** _She’s got everything you’ll ever need_ **

The next time Jisung sees Renjun is on a Friday, when he walks into his own room to discover said boy in his bed, cuddling with the stuffed mouse Jeno got Jisung for his birthday.

“Hello?” 

“Hi,” Renjun looks undeniably cute in Jisung’s bed, but Jisung is still very confused.

“You’re here?”

Renjun nods, looking out of the younger boy’s window with a look that Jisung can’t decipher until he says his next words, “Only ‘cause you’ve been avoiding me.”

“Oh.”

And truth be told, Jisung _ is _ avoiding him. He’s stopped calling him everyday, instead opting for one-word texts that say something along the lines of _ busy rn, ttyl _ or _ kinda sleepy sorry._ Of course, he doesn’t feel so good about the times that Renjun was stressed or upset, but he figures that Donghyuck was there to cheer him up every time, because of course he would.

Jisung has also been avoiding Renjun on social media when Renjun shares a tweet with him or tags him in pictures of cute dogs. The latter is a little harder to avoid, especially when it has anything to do with pitbulls, but Jisung pushes through and ignores the gestures. There were moments where he would catch himself typing out a reply, but his thoughts often betrayed him and he’d suddenly think of what Donghyuck might say, leading him to overanalyze his potential responses. _ Donghyuck would be a lot less awkward_, Jisung would say to himself, _ and way funnier_. 

So most of the time, he deleted any words he might have typed out and left it at that.

“Why?” Renjun sounds more upset about it than Jisung thought he would.

“Who let you in?” Jisung avoids the question poorly, setting his backpack down on the floor near his desk before climbing into the bed next to his boyfriend. He can hear his heart beating from the unexpected yet inevitable confrontation.

“Your mom. Now answer me, Jisung. Why have you been avoiding me?” Renjun’s hand travels across the blanket to grab Jisung’s and all the tension leaves the younger boy’s body.

“It’s um.” Jisung focuses his eyes on the EXO poster tacked onto the wall across from him, “It’s really stupid.”

“I know.”

He huffs, eyeing the way the older boy runs his thumb across Jisung’s knuckles slowly. He’s missed this more than anything.

“You know Donghyuck?”

“... Yes. I know my best friend, Jisung.”

“Stop, you know that’s not what I’m trying to get at here,” Jisung looks up from their joined hands to send Renjun a glare. Renjun laughs and leans in to press a kiss on the younger boy’s forehead before gesturing him to continue. Flustered, Jisung takes a moment to collect himself again before mumbling, “I was jealous.”

“Jealous?” Renjun tilts his head to the side, eyebrows linked together with confusion, “Why would you be jealous?”

“Donghyuck is really pretty, Jun. Like really, really pretty,” Jisung feels the words spilling out of his mouth before he could stop them or even just process them. “And he does all these things that I can only wish I could do, like come to your dorm and bring you to all these places and he buys you all your favorite snacks without you asking. Not to mention, you were literally in love with him a year ago. Like, enough to draw him at least once a day. I’ve seen your sketchbooks.

“He’s some kind of makeup expert or something, I’m sure you know a lot about that. I follow him on Instagram and he posts all these videos of him singing and God, even his _ voice _is pretty. Donghyuck is just … perfect. Perfect for you, most importantly. You said it yourself, he knows you better than anyone. You get to see him every day!” 

He feels stupid for spilling all of it to Renjun, but for the first time in a while, his heart feels free from all the pressure it had been under the past few weeks. It’s relieving, but Jisung also still feels like he’s about to explode with how hard it’s pulsing.

“Jisung, you’re an idiot,” Renjun doesn’t wait even a second after Jisung finishes.

Jisung pouts, “I know, but you really can’t say I’m wrong about any of it. He’s perfect and just so much better than…” He doesn’t need to finish the sentence because Renjun tugs at him with so much force that he can tell that the older boy just knows.

Renjun speaks again once Jisung is settled with his arms around the older’s waist, “You’re a big idiot, but it makes sense why you’d think that way. Donghyuck really is amazing, I think you and I both know I wouldn’t date anyone less than that. But, you also have to remember that that’s why I’m with you now, Sung.”

He makes a fair point, Jisung admits to himself. 

Renjun continues, “You’re so talented and so smart and so _ loving_, baby. I love you and your dumb TikTok videos and the million stuffed toys you own. There is nothing any more perfect to me than that.”

They sit in silence for a few minutes, accompanied by the slight rustling of the sheets every time Jisung moves his leg out of discomfort.

He thinks about it a little too hard, gets so lost in his thoughts that he doesn’t even remember how much time has passed before he even thinks to reply. Jisung sits and wonders just how worried Renjun must have been to come all the way back home just to find out what was wrong. He thinks about it a little more and realizes that the older boy loves him just that much, and that he has nothing to worry about in terms of Donghyuck. Not after this, no.

“I love you too,” Jisung says finally. “I’m sorry.”

“There’s nothing wrong with being jealous,” Renjun promises, hooking his ankle with Jisung’s to stop him from moving around so much. “Just means that we’re afraid to lose who we love.” The statement resonates with Jisung perfectly.

He later realizes that Renjun’s really awkward with his words, no different than Jisung himself, but Jisung knows he wouldn’t have it any other way.

**Author's Note:**

> [twitter](http://twitter.com/m4rksung) | [cc](http://curiouscat.me/honeychenjis)


End file.
